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noun. to tell someone to do something, or to say that something should be done, in a way that shows you have authority. Not to mention rejoice in the arrival of a Jew in Israel. For example, Jews who now coalesce around the Georgia Senate candidate Raphael Warnock, an obvious Jew-hater and Israel-basher by any reasonable definition, excuse his hostility and cover up his sins, should take a good look in the mirror. Even then, I would never characterize a psak as “telling people what to do,” which sounds abrasive. Hence, kids leave their stuff all over the house despite being told hundreds of times to pick it up. You miss out on their experience, creativity, and opinions. If they don’t feel consulted or haven’t provided input, they won’t likely appreciate why your plan is the best. Create a free website or blog at There is no guarantee the person you are telling is listening. Start by explaining the “why”. They should think about how very mean and cruel this is, not to mention extremely wrong! See more. Confirm in clear terms what was agreed upon and will be implemented. Others are pros. What is even more troubling is how this pungent partisanship forces partisan Jews to criticize Israel in order to rationalize their support of their party favorite. Why couldn’t they just “entertain [the] thought without accepting it”? A constant desire for more is not usually a reason people like to give more. The echo chamber can become quite tedious, although these days it is never lonely. to some extent; Funny people (earn a living telling jokes) 'always after this always start to do … And parents do that frustrate their children? If I announce to the world that I am a Yankees fan or a Mets fan, I am not demanding that all Jews follow suit. It is the least effective way to impart knowledge and sustain reliable performance. Employees get equally tired of being micromanaged and told how to do their jobs. Maybe rabbis can even demonstrate to all others that it is possible to disagree without becoming disagreeable, without making personal what is essentially political. SINCE 1828. So, if you cannot change someone’s behavior by telling them what do, what can you do to change their behavior? If you know what that is, it's a good idea to tell them, or they will come up with their own ideas of how to help, which may or may not be what you need. “What do you do?” If you’re like most people, you probably get the answer dead wrong. to order or strongly advise someone to do something. Authorities have "reached the limit... [of] telling people what to do", Wales' top doctor has said, warning of a "perilous" rise in coronavirus cases. I did preach in Israel, and there such a notion is even more preposterous. If you don't complain and coerce as much, people would be more willing to give you more than if you were to constantly ask for more. Steve Jobs — ‘It doesn't make sense to hire smart people and then tell them what to to , We hire smart people so they can tell us what to do.’ Change ), You are commenting using your Twitter account. While you are lecturing your teenager, for example, they are probably thinking about what they are going to do with their friends as soon as you’re done. I struggle to understand the third group – the ones who took no public position. We can rebuke people over incidents or we can help reveal unto them their identity in Christ. The views expressed here are solely my own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of family, friends, shul, organizations or any other affiliations. It’s a simple question, and you’ve probably answered it hundreds of times. noun. People like sex columnist and podcaster Dan Savage argue that herpes infection is so common and so minor a health issue for most people that they should not be required to tell … Scientists have a term for this: psychological reactance. Certain people are entitled to their surroundings and they're used to being that way. Discuss “how” the solution will be implemented. Change ). 205 synonyms for Tell: inform, notify, make aware, say to, state to, warn, reveal to, express to, brief, advise, disclose to, proclaim to, fill in.... What are synonyms for telling what to do? Telling people what to do Telling people why to do it Asking people why they’d want to do it From Cop to Coach to Counselor… Compliance or Change? A gentle nudge, like "Wearing a mask protects you and others," can go a long way, says Sax. Of course, when fallen folks are telling other sinful people what to do, it can go sideways in a hurry. What amazes me is - I opposed this very idea of people telling me how to do my work and in turn did it to people working with me because I didn't realize I was doing it. Marc Elias, a top Democratic Party lawyer who frequently argues high-profile elections cases in court, said that "the president just committed a felony" by telling people to violate election laws. In theory, their argument is plausible. That's where your happiness begins. Discuss and agree on the level of your involvement in the implementation and accountability that is required. People have no ownership in what you tell them to do. People who are told what to do miss out on the opportunity to learn. It will impact people’s lives, certainly in the short term. He started making calls, telling people what happened. A psak is a psak, not an opinion, and must be heeded. Here is why I don’t accept it. That is how it should be. Not everyone could or should do it, but Pollard’s valor always impressed me more than most of his critics’ poltroonery. This entry was posted in Uncategorized. It may be that you only need to know when something is completed. Hope you enjoyed the video and don't forget to subscribe to my channel. To do so makes the rabbinate appear irrelevant and disengaged from what is most on people’s minds at any particular juncture. Include as much of their idea as possible. There is no shortage of family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, businesses, and of course, magazines and websites offering plenty of guidance about what you should or shouldn't do. 2, The Jewish Ethic of Personal Responsibility, History of Zionism, Part 3: Planting Seeds [audio], Chanuka and the Eternal Struggle with Yavan [audio], History of Zionism, Part 2: The Early Zionists [audio], History of Zionism, Part 1: Historical Zionism [audio], The Torah Reading on Simchat Torah [audio], Zdonot, Shegagot and Zchuyot: Understanding the Teshuva Process [audio], Adam Harishon - First to Sin, First to Repent [audio]. Login or Register. Hello, GAMES; BROWSE THESAURUS; WORD OF THE DAY; WORDS AT … view recents. When you tell people what to do they don’t feel valued. For more information, see our Cookie Policy. British informal someone who uses threats or … You are not alone. Telling people what to do Telling people why to do it Asking people why they’d want to do it From Cop to Coach to Counselor… Get into the details of the implementation only to the extent you have confidence that it will achieve your desired outcomes. Try. to keep telling someone what to do as if you have authority over them, in a way that annoys people. Maybe they will find logical flaws in the rabbi’s argument and have their own opinion confirmed. How to tell if your Facebook has been hacked (and what to do) Here's a simple way to see if there is someone messing with your Facebook account. That they and so many others can’t is one of the more execrable features of modern life, and itself engendered an interesting discussion in recent months in the rabbinic world. That’s why telling someone that they’re important to you, that you need them … There is a rabbinic model in which the status of toothpaste on Shabbat is an inescapable and weekly reality that is more meaningful and unchanging. Telling definition is - carrying great weight and producing a marked effect : effective, expressive. The latter is coercion, typical of tyrannies, and not teaching at all. Surround yourself with people who love to do what you hate to do. Captured spies in the recent past who were Chinese-Americans, Muslim-Americans, Christian-Americans and the like did not seem to evoke the same universal fears among their compatriots. People have no ownership in what you tell them to do. If it fails, they don’t care. People who kidnap Americans overseas don’t just wake up and say, ‘Let’s grab someone today.’ They do a lot of surveillance," Erickson says. Involve them, gain their buy-in, leverage their good ideas, and reach agreement with them on what they will do so they take ownership and pride in doing it. It was your stupid idea to begin with. Reach agreement on the problem you want solved or the opportunity you hope to leverage. Bookmark the, The Jewish Ethic of Personal Responsibility Vol. When you tell someone what to do you don’t leverage their knowledge. Friends and family members also get little pleasure out of being told what to do and how to do it. Uncover and discuss any objections about your desired future and expected timing. You can change your cookie choices and withdraw your consent in your settings at any time. ( Log Out /  Select Accept cookies to consent to this use or Manage preferences to make your cookie choices. For his efforts, the rabbi was “unfriended” (or whatever the term is) by a number of people who, presumably, do not like Pollard, his arrival in Israel, the clip or the prime minister. Synonyms for telling what to do in Free Thesaurus. bully boy. If you demand impossible things of yourself and let people do the same, you let yourself down. When I express my opinion on a certain political issue, detractors say “who is he to tell me what to do?” But when I give a psak, a definitive halachic ruling, the detractor’s response is “well, that’s his opinion.” They have it backwards! An opinion is just that, an opinion, and one can agree or disagree. Too many people with clinical depression feel alone—a state that only worsens their condition. Make it easier for people to do what they love to do. Learning the difference between a psak and an opinion is a prerequisite to understanding and learning anything from a rabbi. People tell you what they WANT you to do. It is high time for an identity check. State the overall problem you are trying to solve or the opportunity you are hoping to leverage. They feel repressed, slowed down, and under-appreciated when relegated to merely doing what they are told. Don’t assume that people have the same vision or values that you do. They don’t know the alternatives that were considered or why other options were rejected. Title: telling people what to do, Author: monika hardy, Name: telling people what to do, Length: 38 pages, Page: 1, Published: 2020-08-09 . A less than perfect idea that is fully bought into by the implementer is often better than a perfect idea not bought into by the implementer. informal someone who argues with a lot of force, making other people feel rather afraid. A major objective of spy craft is to turn citizens against their own country, and it is certainly despicable when the spying country is an enemy of the host country (unlike the Pollard case, in which he was charged with spying for an ally). This is sometimes hard to do, but it’s healthy to let others know about your sadness, anxiety, anger, or other emotional distress. bruiser. Or, to the opposite extreme, you may need an hourly progress report. Jews, and the world, could use a few more educated minds. Top performers won’t tolerate it. What you want to do instead is to show people that you’re happy to do your job. In return, they probably won’t give you their best effort. Teaching is about sharing ideas and values, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than telling people what to do. I don’t know how people vote nor are they obligated to inform me or to accept my opinion on these matters. Officials, people telling others to 'old their tongue? With that information they will be able to move forward. Those rabbis eschew all news as immaterial to their primary focus, and Jews have the right to choose those rabbis to guide them. It’s a very narrow-minded way of looking at the incredibly diverse world that we live in. Then it panders to the spirit of intolerance rampant in society and is tantamount to self-censorship. They don’t contribute anything to the situation. If what you tell them works, they don’t feel any credit because it was your idea. Even people with the best intentions are influenced by their own desires. Even people with the best intentions are influenced by their own desires. They think you didn’t care enough about their opinion to ask for it so they don’t feel very important. You miss out on the use of their brain and the process of building upon each other’s ideas. Such is an opinion, or a preference. Tell people what to do so they can participate in something bigger than themselves. This worldview is the implication of the story between Phillip and the Ethiopian. They don’t know how you arrived at your decision. The same goes in spades for Jewish politicians (all Democrats) who look the other way at anti-Jewish statements made by their teammates that would feign apoplexy over if made by a Republican. Remove barriers and obstacles. And if it is purely an opinion, well, educated people should be able to “entertain a thought without accepting it.” Maybe they will re-think their opinion. I have always believed that rabbis should never shy away from addressing the major, even controversial, issues of the day. It is plausible. But it doesn’t stop you from telling people what to do. By using this site, you agree to this use. Sometimes God is telling you to do more for others because you simply feel led to. Still yet, we must be disciple-makers. The rabbi chose to speak that morning on the topic of toothpaste on Shabbat, important in its own right but something that left the congregants quite deflated. Many people will ask what they can do to help. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your account. The better way to achieve something through others is to engage them in a dialog. Me going around people and order them what to do! In his recent article Stop Telling People What To Do, Keith Webb has completely busted the common leadership myth that “your people just need to be told what to do ‒ they just need more info.”. ( Log Out /  These managers grumble that they are constantly having to tell their people what to do and how to do it. Appreciate what you have. British informal someone who is always telling other people what to do, in a way that annoys them. … If we ask in our daily prayers that God should not test us, this would be one test worth avoiding. noun. It is harder to justify that approach in the modern world, and rather than display an intense focus on Torah it can also result from an unwillingness to take sides, make anyone unhappy, or a dearth of knowledge. Don't accuse, threaten, blame, or make light of what your friend is feeling. I am still mystified by the first group but respect their opinion – at least until President* Biden demonstrates hostility to Jews and Israel, and then they will be held to account. Nevertheless, the point here is my inability to understand why the rabbi’s post should lead a tiny but intolerant band to cancel him, as if a mere post renders his Torah unworthy of study and disqualifies him as a human being. Create a dialog about the “why”. Many Jews opposed Zionism, the Balfour Declaration and the establishment of the State of Israel because of the fear of the “dual loyalty” indictment. Teaching Torah is more important than who wins or loses a presidential election. In such a polarized environment, taking sides could have the potential of alienating congregants on the “other” side. People who are not involved in deciding something are not bought into implementing it. bossy-boots. This clue was last seen on December 11 2017 on New York Times’s Crossword. ( Log Out /  Wouldn’t that be something? Nevertheless, if important enough, the rabbi can make his opinions known in other forums, which is far removed from “telling people how to vote” and obviously not seeking vengeance against those who vote otherwise. A study spanning 40 years of research offers a game-changing solution: Ask them a question. It also convinces no one of anything. Since you never engaged their brain, they learned little about what you want done. If you don’t feel comfortable doing this, you may want to find a support group or a mental health counselor to help you. order around phrasal verb. When someone behaves in a way that's foreign to their circle they find it wrong or embarrassing. Gain people’s buy-in for the big picture. This makes people feel as though they’ve imposed upon you. It also convinces no one of anything. ( Log Out /  Had I been active in the American rabbinate, it would have been unthinkable that I would have mentioned the political wars on the High Holidays. Give them a chance to come up with solutions before you bias them toward yours. Three sides formed during the recent presidential election. Talented, smart, and self-starting employees won’t stick around long when they aren’t empowered to make decisions. Tell people to do more of what they love. What it does mean is that the good rabbi knows what is on people’s minds – fears, issues, concerns, insecurities – and tackles them directly with the wisdom of Torah and Chazal. That is not to say that every sermon – or, indeed, any sermon – must simply be an account of the week’s headlines with a cute spin from the sedra. Telling stories about people, will i be lying? Reserve telling for simple tasks or crisis situations only. People tell you what they WANT you to do. Of course it was a crime (do not do it yourselves) but when lives are in danger, it takes a special person to risk everything to save those lives. Il a commencé à passer des appels, disant aux gens ce qu'il s'est passé. There were rabbis who averred that they openly support the Democrat or openly support the Republican, and rabbis who made a virtue out of non-partisanship and taking no public position. Je dis aux gens qu'elle est morte. And I understand (without embracing) the counterargument that he endangered Jewish liberties in America. How to use telling in a sentence. Teaching is about sharing ideas and values, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than telling people what to do. That brings about true change. One meta-analysis found that while people do often rely on valid cues for detecting lies, the problem might lie with the weakness of these cues as deception indicators in the first place. (There is a subset of Modern Orthodoxy in which a psak is also just an opinion, and they reserve the right to search for a more suitable opinion that coincides with what they wanted to do all along; it’s a small subset.) Bring it to life by giving examples and stories that highlight the impact of the better future. 4. I can only share my judgment, my application of Jewish values to current events, my analysis of what is good or bad for Israel and America – and then the ballot (in many but not all states) is free, fair and secret. It is better not to tell people who you want to be. Why do people gossip? Brainstorm alternatives. If it fails, they don’t care. This is a recurrent pattern in Jewish history. See our, Your First Ninety Days In a New Management…. thesaurus. They turn their brains off and wait for instruction. Some researchers argue that gossip helped our ancestors survive. On this page you will find the solution to Always telling people what to do crossword clue. If you do not yet have a loving support system of positive people in your life, before you do attract those people, it is imperative that you stick to your truth regarding your personal life and stop discussing it with anyone who is not a positive, life-enhancing support system for you. that would be telling! A colleague of mine posted on the internet the moving clip of Jonathan Pollard arriving in Israel this week, kissing the ground and being greeted by Prime Minister Netanyahu. We and third parties such as our customers, partners, and service providers use cookies and similar technologies ("cookies") to provide and secure our Services, to understand and improve their performance, and to serve relevant ads (including job ads) on and off LinkedIn. Antonyms for telling what to do. Once again, you have a privileged white person telling someone of color what to do with their life. If a sense of urgency is needed, explain the “why now” in addition to the “why”. Personally, I believe Pollard is a hero of Israel, placed in an impossible circumstance in which he chose the self-sacrificial route of risking his freedom in order to save Jewish lives. Close. That’s why there’s no single solution that works in every situation. Our assumption is the other person is missing key information. Ironically, these commanding managers then complain that their employees never take initiative and never seem to give their best effort. People’s looks and what they do are not mutually exclusive, and to believe otherwise is to be prejudiced. Paint a vision of a better future. People telling stories turn coarse when drunk; What's achieved by a cleric dividing people? Telling definition, having force or effect; effective; striking: a telling blow. Synonyms: cogent, compelling, conclusive… Antonyms: inconclusive, indecisive, ineffective… Find the right word. order verb. I don’t doubt that Israel has recruited numerous Iranians to spy against that evil regime on Israel’s behalf. To make a virtue out of non-partisanship is as short-sighted as to make a virtue out of the rank partisanship that now afflicts America, in which Republicans and Democrats take turns (investigations, impeachments, the propriety of confirming Supreme Court Justices in the last year of an administration, challenging the Electoral College results, etc.) Telling: having the power to persuade. It is not telling people what to do, but rather giving them information, facilitating. And spouses do that frustrate each other? Asking people about performing a certain behavior influences whether they will do it in the future. LOG IN; REGISTER; settings. One of the most common frustrations people experience is being told what to do. So either you have to accept your circle and change. There have been Russian Jews in Israel who spied for Russia, as there have been American-Israelis who spied for America. command verb. That would be very provincial and a waste of time. Even though telling can be done quickly and with the best intentions, it is rarely appreciated by the receiver. Even though we know that telling people what to do doesn’t work, leaders steadfastly refuse to give up the practice and learn new ways of working with people.   If you don't know what to say, just say that—and tell your friend that you are there for them. When people feel that their choices are restricted, or that others are telling them what to do, they sometimes rebel and do the opposite. The latter is coercion, typical of tyrannies, and not teaching at all. In general, tell the people close to you how you’re feeling. Once you agree on the problem to solve, ask for people’s ideas on how to solve it. What do managers routinely do that frustrate their employees? Many Jews feared that his espionage raised the specter of the “dual loyalty” charge against all American Jews, which, ultimately, is a comment on the level of insecurity of Jews in America. You know this! If you have any other question or need extra help, please feel free to contact us or use the search box/calendar for any clue. People are called to disciple people, which means people must tell people what to do. Agree on how you will follow up and track progress. I would rather stand with Aristotle, and show respect to the educated mind that can endure listening to a contrary opinion, and even entertaining an idea without accepting it. Here are a few principles to consider when wanting others to do something: This website uses cookies to improve service and provide tailored ads. It is a legitimate approach even if it creates a leadership void, as reaction to public events is usually limited to the expression of platitudes. The effect is powerful—it has been shown to last more than six months after the initial questioning. I am a regular reader of the New York Times obituaries. To tell people what to do - thesaurus. After considering alternatives, agree on the “what” to be done. “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”― Aristotle, Metaphysics. Synonyms. If you are in a position of influence, whether at home or work, and want someone to do something, don’t tell them what to do. Issuu company logo. I'm telling people she's dead. SAVED WORDS dictionary. Protecting people’s privacy is a core part of what we do, and we don’t release the information you share to the public or tell other people about your medical history,” said Labus. Decades ago, newly married and still a civilian, I remember one Shabbat in particular when, on the previous day, a horrific terrorist attack had taken place in Israel in which Jews were murdered. They’ve been doing it their whole careers, they’re good at it, and they’ve learned how to avoid getting caught. On several occasions I have noted one of the paradoxes of Modern Orthodox Jewry. If what you tell them works, they don’t feel any credit because it was your idea. Youths should consider that by telling someone to ‘kill themselves’ that they can be arrested and could face jail time. That being said, from a rabbinical perspective much depends on personality and goals. Why We Tell People What To Do. Synonym Discussion of telling. Telling people what to do as Christians is not nearly as effective as teaching people who they are as Christians. They want you to be happy … Hence, employee engagement scores are very low in organizations with managers who don’t empower their people.

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